Sadly, I'm not even interesting to me anymore. I'm sick of sameness, sick of listening to myself mull over the same crap, sick of the job, sick of the routine and I'm still seeing little change on the horizon. I want to do something different, create something beautiful, but I seem stuck in blah. When I get a break from working, I feel either too physically, or too mentally drained, to do anything remotely exciting. I'm trying to accept that-- for now. I'm completely discontent thinking that this stagnation will last for long. I'm determined to claw my way out, do something that isn't work, sleep, or escape from thoughts of work.
I want to find something to look forward to besides my next nap (LOL). Maybe this is just winter blues. I can't say I'm trying hard to find it, but I'm looking for new opportunities to come my way. In the meantime, I'm trying for patience and something better than a tolerable existence. I see glimmers at times.
I did get out a few times this weekend. I went to aerial dance to practice on the fabric and hoop. That was cool. Yesterday, I actually went to a yoga class I didn't teach. Now, I hunger for the time and energy for greater adventure. My eyes are open. I just need some inspiration.
Today I am grateful that my largest complaint is lack of inspiration. I am truly grateful for the comfort of my existence:)
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