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Thursday, July 10, 2008

Malaise

According to Wikipedia "Malaise is a feeling of general discomfort or uneasiness, an 'out of sorts' feeling, often the first indication of an infection or other disease. Often defined in medicinal research as a 'general feeling of being unwell'." This article goes on to state, "The 'winter malaise' is another rendition of the term. This is described as feeling run down, depleted, fatigued, "out of sorts", depressed, or a combination of all the aforementioned symptoms. Unlike the colloquial term, the winter malaise is generally not associated with the oncoming of any particular illness. It is the culmination of the body adjusting to cold winter conditions and a possible depressing atmosphere due to either being forced inside due to the cold, or forced into a mundane daily routine because of the winter conditions."

I think of malaise in terms of the first definition but without the notion of disease. The ironic part is that in my case, I guess my malaise is disease-based. Either way, this has been a rather hard week. I still am achy and exhausted, my shoulder still hurts and today, I feel like I would like nothing better than to stay home all day and even perhaps go back to bed. If this were a regular state for me I would be concerned but this feeling of malaise is very infrequent for me.

I know I have to drag myself out for yoga no matter what because I have hours to put in but I really wish I could just chill. Even with the ibuprofin I have taken I feel rotten. I just wish the pain in my arm and shoulder would go away. It has been waking me up for three nights now and even though I stay in bed until ten, I'm exhausted.

I know I shouldn't bitch, at least I am capable of going to yoga and driving, even when I feel like this. I am not in a realapse and overall I have felt good ever since my last exacerbation ended but I am still annnoyed. I am mostly annoyed at myself because I feel like I should be more productive. The book is stagnating. Even though I keep writing, I seem to have lost my flow. I am suddenly doubtful about the last several pages I have written. Are they even interesting?

On a more positive note... I have completed several cool refashions this week that I plan to post in the next few days on my other blog. I have managed to make it to yoga teacher training and to a few classes this week but I hate it when I feel like I "have to" go to yoga. Hopefully, the cobwebs in my head will clear, my malaise will lift and my body will feel better soon.

3 comments:

LISA EMRICH said...

Please remember to rest. Sometimes you really just have to listen to your body. Give it what it needs or it may decide to take it from you. Trust me, the first option is much more pleasant.

Denver Refashionista said...

Thanks. You're ight. I am going to rest right now :)

Anne said...

Sometimes our writing doesn't flow and no amount of re-reading, re-writing, and/or editing seems to help.

I write everyday. I start by reviewing the last five pages and that gets me going for the day's work. I try to write at least 20 pages a day, sometimes it goes to 50 sometimes it is only 10. That's just how it is, so if you think you have lost your flow, it is time to reread the last full chapter you wrote and go on from there.

It helps. Try it. Good Luck in writing.

Regarding malaise - if you have to think about it, then you no doubt have it! Rest, rest, rest.

Sometimes rest is not lying on a couch. Sometimes rest is taking a break from an activity that is routine and doing something else in its place.

When you do that, then writing and yoga and other loved activities will flow easily again.

Take care,
Anne